Crazy is not cute...Part I

Let me say that again, crazy is NOT cute.

It doesn't matter whether you're a woman or a man, that shit is not cute. 

I will be the first to admit that it's sometimes easier than others to get caught up in the craziness of someone, for whatever reason. Sometimes you think you've seen a side of someone that's so great it's worth putting up with the side you see the most, the "crazy" one. It's not worth it, it never has been, and it never will be. 

For starters, it's dangerous. All those little memes that circulate around the Internet about how it's sexy for a man or a woman, to want to kill you for not responding, are dumb. There's a bit of humor in a morbid sense, but when you seriously look at what's being said, it's dumb AF. Sis might really be unstable and need to seek therapy. Same with whatever man it is that's acting a damn fool. I'm not sure why it's trendy to be crazy but I think it's gotta stop. 

There are a few different types of crazies out there too. Let's keep that in mind. I'm only going to focus a couple right now. We'll start with the lying stalker ex boyfriend (this can also partially apply to the crazy stalker dude you've said 2 words to but never dated as well.)

You two were madly in like, maybe even in love, and suddenly, things didn't work out. You found out he was crazy and that your ideals and morals weren't quite as aligned as you thought in the beginning. Whatever the case may be, some skin was shed and you now see them for the crazy person they are. Some months go by and you haven't spoken but you still think about them, wondering if they think about you too. Well, it seems like the universe must have heard you thinking because HAYYYYY! Look who just popped up in your inbox or call log. A vaguely unfamiliar but familiar phone number. With a text message that looks something like "Hey..." maybe they've even put in a couple of emojis to uh "break the ice". 

So there's two things you can do here. You can decide to respond with nice, friendly words. Or you can hit em where it hurts, and respond with silence.

The best thing you can do in this situation, is ignore them. They only want attention. So don't give it to 'em.

Let's go with the latter and say that you ignored them, leaving them sitting there sad and lonely in your inbox. 

He will either get the hint. Or, he'll try another approach. If that doesn't work, he'll try an even grander gesture to show you how "sorry" he truly is. This is the moment of truth. How you respond to his even grander gesture will show you just how crazy the man is. A few days go by, then a week or so, and he's STILL at it. So you start to question your intuition and convince yourself that this man has changed and/or that behavior for the last couple of weeks is who he is. You caved and communicated with him again, and for a while things are alright. It's been a 3 week whirlwind and just as you originally suspected, he's still the same crazy fuckboy. But how? How did you not see this coming? He was really sorry, and he even brought you flowers and a few of your favorite things just to show his remorse. 

Sis, he wasn't sorry to begin with. He was only sorry that he no longer had you in the emotional turmoil and stronghold of his grip. I have this theory, that when you start to emotionally let go of someone, men in particular, they can sense it. After all, if you've slept together, your souls and bodies are literally intertwined. He gave you some of him, while you gave him some of you. Sleeping with a man, leaves them imprinted in your body (even if you use protection). Especially when you've developed a relationship, or friendship with that man. You slipping away, means he has to come back and make sure you're not fully gone. That is ESPECIALLY true, when he finds himself liking you more than he anticipated. So again, somehow, someway (because he lied and got caught, AGAIN), things fall apart and your relationship is in ruins. 

This is your cue! This is your time to leave, with your head on straight, your drawers still pulled up, and with one less unnecessary heartache. Do not get suckered into his ploy again. 

You learned your lesson the first time, no? Why keep going back to touch the hot stove if it's not necessary? I know we done all been under the "Dicked Down Proper" ('DDP') spell before, but, sis, you gotta be stronger. Don't fall for the sweet nothings and grand gestures, AGAIN. Technology (sex toys) is far too advanced for you to be stuck in this rut, because his pipe game, is on plumbing status. He's going to continue to lie and be the same person, because he has NO incentive or reason to be anything else. The lies are probably going to get more outlandish and unbelievable with each return. The notion that him telling you outlandish lies to gain trust and win you over emotionally and physically, is NOT CUTE, it's CRAZY, AF.

It's even crazier for someone to find that attractive, appropriate, and acceptable. Do yourself, and your lady-parts a favor, keep your sanity, dignity, and self worth. Don't respond. Don't go back. Just invest in a good toy. Trust me, you'll be much happier in the end. Plus, I don't know if you've heard, sanity and self worth are the new sexy. Someone better will be way more attracted to you because a cloud of negative energy won't be hovering over you, waiting to rain on any happy moment that comes your way.